Burning bridges

With a little over 10 weeks to go and to think when this trip became concrete in my mind I had 650 days to go. I have reached the point of no return, my relationship with Linda is still great but has an expiry date, I’ve handed in my resignation and I’m slowly burning the bridges around me. I’m selling what I can from my property/ stuff that I won’t be taking with me and don’t treasure enough to put into storage for the next couple of years.

Building up to the last goodbyes (some of which will be permanent due to age or sickness), last weekends away with friends and last nights on the beer with colleagues.

Despite the built up to what feels like the end of my current life which up until today I felt I would never return to I find  myself imagining my life after the trip. I often play with the idea that the trip will never end and that from time to time I’ll work for a short time to once again be able to cycling off into the sunset. But at the same time I find myself looking at the prices of small flats to rent or even buy after my trip (read very small flat because I’ll  be poor).

I can imagine new projects, dreams and challenges like this lego flat: 

After living for 2 years in 5m of tent a 25m flat may seem like luxury.

For someone who loves living by the day and only thinking about my trip its pretty weird to be confronted with the fact that one day the trip may end and a “normal” life will follow. Weird is an understatement I’m already scared!

Why would I worry about it, its so far away? I suspect I’m just having an overdose of too much time waiting around and not enough being on my trip. Or maybe I’m just looking for a distractoin to stop me getting organised with the boring stuff I really need to be worried about before I leave. Time to start calling banks, solicitors, council and all that boring stuff I assume.

All the same its interesting to see that now I’ve burned my bridges here for my trip and there’s no turning back that I’m now scared of the next big journey in life, and that journey seems more scary than cycling through Africa. Just as well I’ve got alot of time to think about the solution to this little problem and before long I’ll have enough day to day worries to put this one to rest for a while.

End of  mindless 2am ramble…..and time for bed.